Friday, August 30, 2013

Becoming a #SuperMilkMan for a Chance to Meet Duane 'The Rock' Johnson

So my buddies over at Life of Dad asked if I wanted to participate in their #SuperMilkMan promotion for the chance to meet Duane 'The Rock' Johnson. The instructions were simple. Show how milk can turn me and my kids into Super Milk Men, much like The Rock in his Superbowl XVII ad Seen here:

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Hey Miley, It's Your Life You Can Twerk if You Want To

Am I saying that right? Twerk? I like that word. I feel like it should mean tweeting at work, which I never do and neither should you. But hey, you're 20 years old and you get to make your own decisions. So if you want to tweet while working, or rub your butt on the married crotch of beloved Canadian actor, Alan Thicke's son, you go right ahead. It's your life and you can twerk if you want to. That's all I have to say to you Miley 'definitely reading this and every other "open letter" on the internet' Cyrus. Thanks for reading. Moving on now. 

If I've learned anything over the last 32 years, it's that nothing increases the value of a youth commodity more than parental outrage. Well congratulations online parenting community, you have made Miley Cyrus the hottest thing to happen since Mortal Kombat came out on the Sega Genesis. 

She could totally beat Raiden. Raiden suuuuucked.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Review: 'Modern Dads' is Funny, but Misses an Opportunity to be More

I have heard a lot about the development of A&E's new reality show "Modern Dads". I was even contacted by a casting agent early in the process. I never responded, mainly because I once attempted to forbid my wife (girlfriend at the time) from turning in an audition tape for The Real World. She didn't even want to audition, but I had a nightmare that she had been cast on the show, cheated on me with her ridiculously named bisexual roommate, and then broke up with me over the phone on national television. The next morning I started a fight that really didn't need to be started, but eventually ended when we both agreed to never be on reality television. I digress. Back to Modern Dads. Here's the 30 second spot in case you haven't seen it.

Friday, August 16, 2013

Tristan Kaminer and a Disease With No Name #FiveDollarFriday

Hey gang. Last week I was contacted by Ask Your Dad reader, Caleb Kaminer. His adorable daughter, Tristan, has a disease so rare that it doesn't even have a name. Basically, everything she eats or drinks goes into her lungs instead of her stomach. They've been working with doctors around the country to try and find a cure. Here is their story.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

The Religion Post

Hi Everyone, 

This post has been a long time coming.  I have written and rewritten it. I have three different versions sitting in draft. It started as a simple question; Should Stevie and I be taking our kids to church? Then, much like every other question regarding religion has done in my life, it led to more questions. Which church? Why? How often? Should we try multiple churches? Shop around? And bigger questions… is religion necessary for morality? Will my kids be ostracized if they don't have a religion? And then, finally, the biggest question. What if I don't believe? Do I lie? Do I pretend? Does that do more harm than good?

And so it goes… over and over and over. Now, the file titled "The Religion Post" is the only thing I can see in my working folder. It is always there, staring at me, telling me to open it, to finish it, to make a decision. It has gotten to the point that I can't write anything else. It is killing my creativity. This religion post is my white whale!

So here, take it for what you will, judge, comment, argue. Let's get it over with. I need to purge the topic from the editorial calendar of my soul. I need to get back to writing about important stuff – like whether dogs are like kids and pooping in McDonald's Play Places

Jesus on Toast
I couldn't think of a picture, so you get Jesus toast. 

Monday, August 12, 2013

Kiss My Boo Boo by Guest Artist @Lunarbaboon

Chris at Lunarbaboon is one of my favorite artists on the web. His comics are funny, heartfelt, and sometimes irreverent. They bring a smile to my face every time they appear in my news feed.  I'm honored that he took the time to draw Duchess and I for an exclusive comic just for Ask Your Dad! If you would like to see more of his work, you can find him on Facebook, Twitter, or on his site, Tell him I sent you! Thanks again Chris!

Kiss My Boo Boo by Lunar Baboon

Thursday, August 8, 2013

A Quick Post for My Wife on Our Anniversary


Six years ago I met you. Five years ago I proposed to you on the front porch of a bungalow on 5th East. Four years ago today, we were married. On our wedding night we sat on the little patio of our hotel room, looked out over the sky line of Salt Lake City, lifted our glasses, and declared ourselves conquerors. Then we fell asleep… in our chairs, on the patio. Three years ago we brought our daughter into the world and spent the next two years chasing her around. Nearly a year ago, our little boy joined the adventure. With two kids we had to split our time, our efforts, our jobs, but not our love. There's always been plenty of that.

It has been a wild, wonderful ride so far. I am so honored and blessed to be taking it with you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for choosing to build your life with me. Happy anniversary Stevie. I love you more than Mac N Cheese. A lot more. 


Me, Your Husband, The Less Pretty One

We rock.

Monday, August 5, 2013

Snarkton the Insomnia Demon Won't Let Me Sleep (Answers At Walgreens Shop)

I am a member of the Collective Bias®  Social Fabric® Community.  This shop has been compensated as part of a social shopper insights study for Collective Bias and their client.

Here is the story of how I ended up writing a review of the Answers at Walgreens program and how they helped me find sleep solutions. So... I was going to wait a month before doing another one of these paid posts. See, in a way, I get to pick and choose what I review. You may have seen the awesome headlamp review, and Duchess's chance to learn a bit of charity. I picked those and then figured I would give it a month. I don't want to inundate you with paid posts. Then, a few things happened in what felt like a somewhat predestined sequence.