tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post5311972676813794479..comments2024-03-05T10:19:16.909-07:00Comments on Ask Your Dad Blog: Taking My Kid to the Store Doesn't Make Me Brave John Kinnearhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10217999409806454795noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-23534677411143833362015-05-19T00:10:09.936-06:002015-05-19T00:10:09.936-06:00Still a great job well done, for toddlers 2.5 y/o ...Still a great job well done, for toddlers 2.5 y/o + up to 60lbs, try Piggyback Rider - a standing child carrier and you'll surely enjoy outside with them. :)Piggyback Riderhttp://www.piggybackrider.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-70148613979223362102013-01-11T18:12:47.346-07:002013-01-11T18:12:47.346-07:00Way to be brave! Taking a kid to a store is scary ...Way to be brave! Taking a kid to a store is scary stuff I suppose. Keep up the good work!Jaime Van Hoose Steelehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15457537315433437746noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-75092725351775129772013-01-11T17:28:31.256-07:002013-01-11T17:28:31.256-07:00I used to get comments like that all the time when...I used to get comments like that all the time when my twins were infants. It was even more fun being able to tell these people my kids don't have a mom. See, men can raise kids all by themselves! <br /><br />I started feeling sad for those women. What terrible husbands they must have. Thanks for setting the bar low, guys. Now I look like a hero just for spending time with my kids!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-80333159933606958582013-01-11T05:58:20.847-07:002013-01-11T05:58:20.847-07:00haha, I had the same thing happen to me and I'...haha, I had the same thing happen to me and I'm a Mom. A sweet little old lady saw me struggling to lift the 35,000lb car seat into the shopping cart and came over to steady it. She asked, "where's Dad?" And I said, "presumptuous, aren't we?". Not really. I actually said, "He's at work. This is a solo trip to Target." And she smiled so sadly and said, "Bless your heart." I got bless-your-hearted, so don't feel bad. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18424939807394935919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-11727293989043841432013-01-11T02:12:57.864-07:002013-01-11T02:12:57.864-07:00"...to seek out new life and new civilations...."...to seek out new life and new civilations... to boldly go where no man has gone before..." The grocery store! lool<br /><br />I've found a bunch of interesting stereotypes lately. For example, I'm adopting, and my husband and I are adopting as well. The first reaction I get when I tell people is usually something along the lines of "but adopted kids are screwed up", as if we (adoptees) are other people's beaten little puppy dogs, unwanted, and left on the street to fend for ourselves. But in truth, that misconception comes largely from just innocent ignorance. They only know what our culture teaches through media, which is usually some horror story. Truth is, adopted children are no more or less likely to grow up to be serial killers and drug dealers than those raised by their biological parents. Ya just don't hear about the normal ones very often (because that story doesn't sell papers/movies/talk shows). <br /><br />Men usually look at my husband with a mixture of pity (because we can't have kids of our own science and he's stuck with a 'defective' woman for a wife or some such nonsense) and hesitancy. I can understand the hesitancy, but we had actually chosen adoption as our route to expand our family before we got married. While not every person can (or should) be an adoptive parent, it takes a pretty cold heart to turn a way a child sitting on your lap, calling you 'Daddy' because you are filling that role for them. To them, you are that whole world, despite the fact that they may, or may not, have your nose.<br /><br />But all we can do is be living examples, ya know? Be the change you want in the world. ;)-J.D. Humenayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14086704419701940067noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-40157459521970187662013-01-11T00:17:19.008-07:002013-01-11T00:17:19.008-07:00You know, I've just realised, whenever I go ou...You know, I've just realised, whenever I go out without my son and bump into someone I know, I get asked where the boy is. With his dad, obviously. I mean, if I've popped to the shops for 5 minutes to grab milk on a Saturday morning - of COURSE I'm not going to bring the small one with me if there's another adult home. And there's this implication that my husband is doing me a favour there. By sitting at home? It's crazy! No one would THINK of asking Daddy where his son is! <br /><br />And if a group of mums are arranging to go out, dad is so often referred to as 'babysitting' the kid(s) for the evening. My husband alerted me to that one the first time I wanted to go out without him and asked if he could 'babysit' one evening. He said no. He couldn't, because it's his own child, not him doing me a favour by looking after my child - but he did agree to stay home while I went out.<br /><br />I think I shall be heading off to read all your other posts now. :)Nickyckynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-46002695026918101442013-01-09T18:34:26.279-07:002013-01-09T18:34:26.279-07:00There is a piece like this in the book Manhood for...There is a piece like this in the book Manhood for Amateurs where Michael Chabon is at the grocery store with his infant son and is told he is such a great dad. His internal response was F-you I am a good dad and not because I am out in public with a baby, that is easy, i'm a good dad for A, B and C. no one would look at a mom out with a baby and call her brave or think she was great. The low bar of fatherhoodPortland Dadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15177227481763249513noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-5081351329689430652013-01-09T14:14:04.942-07:002013-01-09T14:14:04.942-07:00Here’s hoping she was just joking. But given her ...Here’s hoping she was just joking. But given her ‘older’ age … I’d guess not. Remember the Huggies add from about a year ago? Daddies and diaper time … it would have been better suited to a few generations prior. <br />I love my parents. They are in their early 60’s (I’m the baby, the oops child) and they have a very traditional European mentality when it comes to women’s work and men’s work. My father only changed 3 diapers in his entire life. One for each of his children, and none for any of his 4 grandsons. It was my mother’s job to do the rest. Cooking, cleaning, child rearing, school things, play time, and all things revolving around people. My father was the bread winner, mechanic, inanimate object fixer, disciplinary, and maintenance man for all things in and out of the house type father. That was what they’d learned from their parents, and it suits them just fine. Even today. <br />It routinely shocks my mother when I mow the lawn or take the car for an oil change and my husband makes dinner or entertains our almost 2 year old little boy. She’s beside herself when my career takes me out of town for a few days and he is left solely in charge of our little guy. “How ever does he do it?” The house is always standing and bellies are full just like when he’s out of town and it’s just me … but I don’t get the same credit for ‘parenting’ that he does because “That’s your job Liana”. Give me a break Mama. <br />My husband is fantastic and when I see him reading stories to our little guy, making dinner, or bath time … it makes me sad for my Dad. That just wasn’t something he ever did with us or his grandsons. I can’t help but feel he was cheated out of some really special time with his babies. <br />I can’t say “Good on you for taking your kid shopping.” Captain’s your kid. That’s your job. Funny – you won’t hear of a 30 something year old tell you the same thing in the grocery store. Different generation. LianaShttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14954256531508504637noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-10830006921681213882013-01-09T14:05:46.421-07:002013-01-09T14:05:46.421-07:00Thank God you didn't BLOW HER MIND by saying y...Thank God you didn't BLOW HER MIND by saying you were present at the birth.....Like, for reals, in the room and everything!!!<br /> Of course I jest and get that this is totally a generational thing for her! Actually quite a nice reminder that we have advanced in other ways as a race..... apart from bigger, flatter t.v.'s.... which is also awesome of course!!Lou McIntoshnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-57359869125335039212013-01-09T14:01:39.499-07:002013-01-09T14:01:39.499-07:00I'm a mother of three and I know my husband is...I'm a mother of three and I know my husband is an incredibly capable dad and caregiver (he cooks us gourmet dinners nearly every night so I can swing pickup from school and daycare). But I'm just as guilty as the lady in the grocery store. I often forget that so many of those jobs that I'm "lucky" he helps out on (well all of them really) are just as much his responsibility as mine. I try to remind myself, having children is like signing a lease with a roommate, each of you is 100% responsible for 100% of the rent. <br />I recently had a male friend ask me for parenting advice. Perhaps I can take up the cause and say my advice is you are just as in it as she is. Never forget that, and never let her forget it either. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02396615169235339090noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-79969757208957475532013-01-09T13:45:35.225-07:002013-01-09T13:45:35.225-07:00I've been through similar. Generally I shrug ...I've been through similar. Generally I shrug it off, because there really isn't anything to be accomplished by arguing about it. Exhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17140570989788215244noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-10188004203642450452013-01-09T12:29:06.952-07:002013-01-09T12:29:06.952-07:00"but I would love it, if once, just once, som..."but I would love it, if once, just once, someone told him he was so lucky to be with a woman who is happy to change the baby's nappies the rest of the time..."<br /><br />But what about the Womynz? <br /><br />Just kidding. :) <br />Being appreciated is nice on both sides. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7385734613853151197.post-59294016311309787552013-01-09T12:22:22.457-07:002013-01-09T12:22:22.457-07:00Hi, firstly, what a great blog! I've just stum...Hi, firstly, what a great blog! I've just stumbled across it and have read every single post you've written.<br /><br />I totally hear you on the "so brave" comment. From the other perspective (as the Mum) that sort of comment also drives me a little crazy. People often tell me how "lucky" I am that my partner (male) changes our five-month-old's nappies at the weekends. Don't get me wrong, of course it's great that I get a little break from cleaning up the poo over the weekend, but I would love it, if once, just once, someone told him he was so lucky to be with a woman who is happy to change the baby's nappies the rest of the time... <br /><br />Unthinkable, of course, because it's just a given that Mums change nappies. But, I agree, it would be great to live in a world where people just assumed that Dads could do everything Mums can do - rather than the contrary.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com